Sunday, April 29, 2012


Recapturing Beauty Week One (and to be clear, the site has a '10&'11 version, I'll be doing '11 to start)

The challenge is body kindness, and it suggests yoga for the prompt. Perfect, since I teach yoga; so my extremely wonderful friend Jacqui, had me come and teach the young women, in our old ward, a yoga class. I was slightly sceptical that they would be able to hold it together, but they were phenomenal. I wish I had a picture of this awesome group of girls! I explained a few things about yoga to them, and I'll share some of that here too:
The word yoga means "yoke" or meaning, to join together, to unite. It is a meeting of mind, body, and spirit. We tend to cut these three into separate pieces. We neglect, or torture, our bodies and expect it not to affect our spirit and soul. How many of you lay down at night in your bed, and all of a sudden you start to feel the aches, the pains that you pushed to the side during the day? We cannot continue to disconnect ourselves from our pain, our sensations, because they're there to tell us something. When I teach yoga I remind everyone to really try and be conscious of what their body is telling them that specific day, to listen, and to respond to your body by giving it what it needs, not necessarily what the mind wants, or especially what you think others are expecting of you. People in the western world think yoga is either for super crunchy granola meditation, or for super toned flexible freaks. It really isn't about that at all, it's about opening space and bringing light into our bodies. It's about excepting where were are at this exact moment, while allowing ourselves to gently roll into a new, further than we've ever gone before place. It's about being kind to yourself so that you in turn can be kind to all things, because as Christ said "love thy neighbor as thou loves thyself." It does not matter how far you take the expression of the posture, but how deeply you can breathe into it.

The prompt for this challenge is beautiful, I urge you to at least read it here . This is my favorite quote: "Drink in the kindness of sunshine and the beauty of the earth. Feel the river of kindness flow through your body and carry you forward." 

I am taking the time to be kind to my body; no more diet pills, laxatives, harsh words, unkind thoughts, or practices. I think about the food I put into my body, think about the activities I do, and strive to live a healthy, happy, sunny life. And even though I might not be exactly were I thought I would be, or where I want to be, I'm ok with who I am. The only way to move forward is to first accept where you are. So now I show kindness to the body that has birthed me two children, allows me to love my husband, runs me around the block, laughs when I'm happy, and gives my opportunities I can only dream of. 

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Recapturing Beauty

I, (like many of you, probably?) am obsessed with myself. I try not to say it like that very often, it doesn't taste very great coming out. I tend to try and temper it with a "I'm just trying to take good care of myself"; but, it's the truth, I take it to obsession. I spend way too much time thinking about the 20 pounds I have to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, if my boobs are going to be super saggy after I finish birthing and feeding subsequent children. Whether my teeth are white enough, my eyelashes long enough, my clothes stylish enough. Did you know, (you didn't) that I prefer to sit in front of a mirror while I talk on the phone so that I can just stare at myself. I know where every wrinkle on my face is, the veins on my legs, and I've almost got ever erstwhile hair named. I'm self absorbed in the worst way. I crave acceptance from the way that I look. There, I said it; and there's a fine line of that accepted by society. It's alright to wear makeup, but how much, with what attitude? No one likes the "tramp", but what if that's really how she felt like looking? It's cool to look vintage geek chic, but the homeless man on the corner doesn't look very cool in his second hand clothes. I can have plastic surgery if its reconstructive, but keep it hush hush if it just makes me feel better about myself? And why should it make me feel better, who made it that way? I know that many of my issues stem from a childhood of looking a little different than most of the girls in my class, and though I was ridiculed, I had a supportive loving family. It didn't matter, I feel that I have/am/was bombarded by magazines, TV, radio, everything commercial, and I am definitely a product of a society that over sexualizes, and over simplifies the issue of beauty, both outer and inner.

Oh yes, inner beauty, the king of kings. You see, though I am self obsessed, I have successfully stripped some of that away, and I don't only think of myself. I also try to think about, help, and encourage others to be the best that they can be, by nurturing, teaching, and gently prodding others(if you know me, you know I'm a prodder, its a god given gift). Those things build my inner beauty day by day. But what is it about hearing "you're so hot sexy!" that's so much more flattering than "you're a nice lady"? I don't know!?!?! I value inner beauty, but I want to be beautiful on the outside too. I know that one of those can grow exponentially upward, while the other will begin to wither, hopefully somewhat gracefully. It's up to  me and you, and every person on this planet to take real beauty back! To feel glorious in the skin we're in, while we continue to build and grow both mind, body, and spirit.

This post obviously over simplifies all of the issues discussed, but it is something that I've thought a lot about for the last five years. And I think more and more women are ready to talk about it. Here is a link to a beautiful series some beautiful women I know from church have been doing :

Woman behind the picture (this is part nine, read them all!)

And on Tuesday, my friend Jacqui, asked me to teach a yoga class for the young women of our church, in my old ward. It was to fulfill the first requirement  for this: Recapturing Beauty , a ten day challenge put out by BYU to help you strengthen your belief in yourself. I think its beautiful, and strong. I'm going to do a post once a week for the next ten weeks to do each one. I'd love to hear some of your experiences if you decide to take the challenge too!


Saturday, April 14, 2012

this is why they pay me the big dollas

Teaching Your Children In Dependance

I found this, where else but Pinterest, and I thought I'd share it with you. My niece originally posted it, and I think we both found a few of the markers ahead of their age group; one I found particularly funny, was the advanced politics/law at 14. I chuckled a little there, but also thought that maybe I was underestimating kids in a few of these areas.

I continued to ruminate over it, and really began to think that some of these that I thought were a little advanced, should probably be taught at that age. I come from a family of shelterers, so I have phobias such as riding a bike on the street. So perhaps I should let my five year old learn how to heat canned food? You likey the logic in that one? But seriously, pioneer kids obviously did a lot. I think we're underwhelming our kids in the area of personal progress, while trying to overwhelm them in societal progress (kids with cell phones, i pads, computers, facebook, and every class or sport know to man). Maybe if my children are really starting to grasp advanced politics and law at 14, this world wouldn't be such a crappy place; and, they're probably not going straight from high school basketball to the NBA. I dream of a society where each person can proudly take responsibility for themselves. Where our new stations aren't filled with unchecked facts, and out right lies. Where politicians don't blow a gagillion dollars trying to get me to vote for them so that they can feel important; oh, hey, and maybe they write their own speeches, because guess what? If you didn't write it, then its not really you saying it.

I might be 24, but I think I'm going to start right back at three with Vida, and raise myself, and my kids, right. Because to be honest, there's quite a few things that I don't know how to do that maybe I should have learned at six, or seven. I can't enforce it unless I live it.

And right about here I put away the soapbox.

Happy days everyone!

Friday, April 13, 2012

good golly miss molly

So, I just realized that I have not blogged about my trip home to California, in February, so its not official until I blog about it, its like it never even happened....

 Waking up at my Grandparents house, February!!!! and sitting by the pool!!!!!!

naked, of course.

a day downtown

a walk on the pier to have lunch at Ruby's.

silly family

pool time at grandma and grandpa's

Went to Venice beach for the first time! Wish I'd seen David Duchony, I dream of seeing him and calling him the Duke of Knee.

Royce, looking like a mummy that you'd see in a museum, no? Even the lighting.

Big boy in the afternoon

and yes, sometimes his hair is red, and sometimes its blonde, I'll post a great site for baby wigs soon...

This beautiful little montage I found in B's phone:

                                                      Cray cray hobbit mansion on the beach

 Dad's famous salsa

mine's better

Vida insisted on rolling our carry on the whole time.

Life is good.

Friday, April 6, 2012

oh no!

This is more for anyone in the family:

a news clip of the disaster on the road behind the family cabins.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012


I've decided that I will raise my children to be liberal in heart, mind, and spirit; and modest in word and deed.

That should be super easy.